Struggle with Discouragement

This story happened to me at the time when I was not sure about my capability and had to facing a man who said a discouragement words several times.

(Marc 9:22-24: “It has often thrown him into fire and into water to kill him. But if you can do anything, have compassion on us and help us.” Jesus said to him, “ ’If you can!’ Everything is possible to one who has faith.” Then the boy’s father cried out, “I do believe, help my unbelief!”)

It happened in 2008, when I decided to continue my master degree. At that time, I was applying into a university in France even though I could not speak French even a single word (in France, most of people do not speak English). As information, for normal international students, we have to learn French at certain level by taking a French course (min. 1 year), then repeat the last year of bachelor before enter into master. It means we have to spend 2 years before master.

Lucky me, my professor said that I can enter directly to master without spending 2 years-preparation. And here the problems: first of all, I could not speak a single word in French (I do not understand what “merci” is, so you can imagine how bad it was) and… I was very bad in learning a language; even my English was very bad comparing with my friends in the same class. And the biggest problem was that the course would be in French!!

And at that time, I only had 2 weeks left before my departure to France.  So then I decided at least I must learn how to pronounce the French words even though I did not understand it. I took a private course.

But do you know what the teacher said to me at the very beginning of our course meeting??

        “You will fail for sure!”

       “You know, some students who had already learnt French for 6 months were sent home by their professors! So it is useless for you to go there!”

        “You will fail! For sure! So, just refuse your acceptance!”

I felt very depressed when hearing that. I was so upset (to him and my self because I am bad in learning language) and afraid that it would be happened to me. And he was repeating his words in each meeting for almost 2 weeks!

Of course when I arrived in France, it was not easy to learn a new language from the very beginning. When I could not understand the professors’ speech, the teacher’s words remained steadily in my mind: 

“You will be failed!” repeatedly… 

But I studied very hard, prayed, and tried to keep it in my mind:

        God has already sent me here, in this land, He will never abandon me.

        He will make a way when it seems to be no way.

        If He closes the door, He will open another door.

Now I can say to you, instead of failed, I got 2 master diplomas!

Instead of being sent back to my home country, now I am taking my doctoral program in Germany and France!

How great our God! He makes a way! He opens the door! He does! And He will do a great thing to one who believes Him!

What I want to share with you is:

God gives a dream to every person. (Proverb 23:18: For you will surely have a future, and your hope will not be cut off.)

Do not let anyone else break your dream. It does not matter what the people around you (family, parents, best friends, enemy, spouse, children, etc) say to you, they can say whatever they want to discourage you. 

But you, do not give up just because of what they have said. You must try it, and give your very best. No matter the result is, failed or succeed, you do not have any regret because you have already tried it. DO NOT GIVE UP!!! A failure is not a dead end, but it means one step closer to success.

GBU!

Catholic Dignity